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Personal and Public Relationships: Strengthen our Core

Tamana loved Ranjan when they both were undergoing training as IAS probationer officers at LBSNAA. After their training, they married each other and were allotted same state cadre. Both were posted as SDM to two subdivisions in the same district. Taman came to know that Ranjan was getting tempted by bribe offers offered by mining barons in the region to overlook certain land-related issues.

One day she came to know conclusively that Ranjan had taken bribes from some people. She also comes to know that the favors for which Ranjan has compromised would create a great loss to the state exchequer. She is an upright officer and has made herself a good name. If she takes a drastic step, it might endanger her marriage.

Question – What should Tamana do knowing her husband is involved in graft and her marriage to him might get jeopardized if she takes a drastic step?

Answer: Facts:

  • Ranjan is involved in corruption.
  • Tamana loves Ranjan and their marriage might be troubled if Tamana decides to take any drastic step.
  • Tamana should confront Ranjan directly. She should place the evidence that she has in front of her to Ranjan and ask him to explain those.

There are several possibilities then:

  • Ranjan accepts his fault and agrees to change.
  • Ranjan accepts his fault, but ask Tamana to ignore this one-off incident.
  • Ranjan is defiant.

In the 1st case, Tamana needs to support Ranjan while he confesses before the anti-corruption agency of the state, and the repercussion that follows thereafter. In the 2nd case, Tamana needs to convince Ranjan to submit before the anti-corruption agency. A crime is a crime, and it is best to serve the punishment and then come out with a clear conscience.

In the 3rd case, Tamana needs to tell Ranjan that his defiant attitude might force her to go to the anti-corruption agency herself and submit the proofs that she has with her. She should express her love for Ranjan, but at the same time remind him of his duty and morals. The act of emotional shaming to actually change the attitude of a person is very much supported by our judiciary. E.g. Justice Verma panel did not reduce the age of the juvenile, also, he did not recommend the death sentence. The principle of hate the sin and not the sinner clearly indicating the fact that the candidate thinks on the lines of Gandhi and Buddha.

The situation demands Tamana to show the principle of professional responsibility & competence. At first place rather than satisfying self-interest. The decision making skill & moral obligation needs to be exercised Tamana should immediately approach the higher authority &anti-corruption mechanism to address the issue. This will result in first, saving of precious natural resources from underutilization or mal utilization. And second, Corruption will not find approval in social life & professional life.

With respect to her personal relation, Tamana needs to take account of earlier lie or hiding information (corruptive) by Rajan. She should not let her decide to threaten their personal life. A consolatory mechanism/meet with Rajan regarding his fault of deviating from professional, moral & personal obligation should be taken to save relation. But if in vain, then she should move on in life – considering she is competent & deserving honest person.

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